I want to run away. I want to become something that no one remembers. That no one misses. I want to become something not even my closest lover could recognize, I want to become something so beautiful, so kind that they will never forget what they drove away. I want to become something so sick and mangled and fucking disgusting that no one would miss me. No one would remember the harm that I caused because it is in my nature to harm. It is in my nature to destroy. It is in my very nature to be destroyed.
This story does not have a happy ending. I don't know fucking anything but that. I know that one of these days I will be nothing but a fucking corpse. I know that teenagers will find my carcass in the woods and they will scream and they vomit and they will be irrevocably changed. And then they will snicker. And they will laugh.
They always laugh.
This is my good. This is my will. This is my testament.
Please Please Please Do not fucking bother looking for me. Do not fucking bother missing me because you never even knew me.